JUST ANOTHER MELLOW DRAMATIC DAY!

JUST ANOTHER MELLOW DRAMATIC DAY!


What you dont know wont hurt you....

B*&%S*%#!

I’ve known that for the longest time, but sometimes I just can’t stop myself…
A few days ago, Carla my sister told me; “Ate, I think Francis has a new girl, Carlo saw it on Friendster.” I just told her; “Really, good for him.” Hiding my curious face of course…
April 13, 2009 I checked my account while waiting for my dentist, it seems that were not friends anymore… Got a feeling the rumor is true. I told myself it’s not for me to know and not for me to find out.

April 14, 2009 Monday - usually hell day for us in the office. Surprisingly we finished everything before 4:30pm; another surprise is that we can now log on to FACEBOOK and FRIENDSTER using our laptop. Hence, I had a chance to sneak a peek on both of my accounts. Was hesitant to look into my friendster account, but I really have to see it. “Bahala na si Batman!” Besides, so what if he has a girl, I was the one who had a boyfriend a few months after we broke up… so what’s the big fuzz...

Here it goes,

Fumbling thru my account, it was then clear to me that we’re no longer connected on that site. That alone made me sad. After two years? We can’t even be friends anymore? I really can’t believe why people do that. Erase their ex’s at Friendster… Why? Well, he can’t erase the fact that we’ve been friends till high school and together for two freaking years!! You can’t just erase people who’ve been part of your life. You just can’t!

Here it goes, again…

Hush…

I relaxed for a few minutes, contemplating on should I check his account or should I not. Of course the stupid side of me won. I checked it... It is confirmed, he has a new girl.

My hands are clammy and cold, I was nervous. Not hurt of course, can’t describe what I felt but I’m sure it’s not that. She’s pretty, but she has too much makeup on. I think I’m prettier than her, I have X-Factor! Hahahahahaha!!! Just kidding… Why is he attracted to feisty chicks? I am, and this new girl looks like one too.

Wow! I really don’t know what I feel. It just hit me, we are really finally over. His world does not revolve around Aimee and my world doesn’t revolve around Francis anymore. He now has Ish (I don’t know what is the girl’s real name) and I now have Vic. I remember the last time we spoke as boyfriend and girlfriend, April 1, 2008, he cried and I cried… I can’t believe it took a year for the break up to sink in.

I love Vic. I don’t want to make this sound too arrogant, but had a lot of choices when he was courting me. There’s TJ very cute guy who has everything actually, Erik whom I enjoyed talking too but I really can’t see ending up with (not a chance), or Francis whom at that time I can go back to. Then there was Vic. I really don’t have a precise reason why he is the one I picked. All I know is that I followed what I felt. I’m the most indecisive person and the worst drama queen you’ll ever know. I will definitely nod my head in agreement if you tell me that in my face, because I really am. But Vic gets me, he does.

What you don’t know wont hurt you, but the truth does set you free. Now I am free from the “what ifs”. I’m now able not only to move on but to let go. Let go of anything I had and have from my relationship with Francis. If he chooses to move on and live he’s life without me, even as friends it’s his call and I respect that.